Learning Not to Squeeze

Yesterday, David Toms, a 40-year old American golfer lost the Players Championship in a sudden death playoff. On the first hole of the playoff, a treacherous par 3, with a postage-stamp sloping green surrounded by a lake, Toms hit a safe, but well-placed tee shot, to the largest part of the green, leaving himself some chance for birdie, but ultimately the opportunity to play the next hole if he could just sneak away with a 2-putt. His first putt rolled 3 feet past the hole, an easy come back par putt uphill with very little break. For the first time all week, Toms missed the 3-footer, and with that his hopes at winning the Players Championship. With a gallery full of hundreds maybe thousands of onlookers, the fear got the best of him. 

We've seen before in golf. The pro missing the seemingly easy putt on the world's stage. In Zen Golf: Mastering the Mental Game, Dr. Joseph Parent discusses this phenomenon of "squeezing." When we are confronted with fear our body's natural reaction is to tense up (called a brace response). Our senses heighten, our muscles tense, and we lose the ability to move fluidly. In golf, that translates into gripping the club too tightly, and by losing your calm, you can't act or in this case putt the way you visualize in your mind. In other words, our minds tell our bodies to act, but when in the grip of fear, the tension overcomes our ability to do so. The best golfers in the world, are the ones who learn to master that fear. And, in business we too have to master that fear on a daily basis. 

Fears in small business take on a wide variety of faces. 

It could be fear that you aren't going to meet a deadline, fear that you don't have what it takes to pull off a task, fear that you are going to lose a client to a competitor, fear that your employees are going to leave for something better, or any of the other ones that come to mind. It's the thing that gives you a sick feeling in your stomach when you think of it. The thing that makes you sweat a little when you consider what would happen if...

So how do we take control over these fears?

I heard someone say the other day, that as small business owners, every day we wake up unemployed. Interesting take, but completely based in fear. First we must position our thoughts on the right side of the "what ifs." For every negative outcome to the question of "what if," there is an equal and opposite positive outcome.

We have to remember that all we can do is our best, and if you're squeezing, you're not allowing yourself to do your best. There are times when I'm up against a hard deadline, pushing to get that creativity to flow, when the fear starts to grow inside me. What if I miss this deadline? What if I don't come up with an idea that's good enough, or don't deliver on the quality of work that I have promised? What if they never want to work with me again? What if, what if, what if...? One things is for sure, the fear snuffs out the creative flame immediately. 

It's in these times, that I have to take a deep breath and let go. I have to stop squeezing.

I have to trust what got me here in the first place. Trust my motivation. As a Christian, I have to trust in God. I have to realize that ultimately, past the point where I've given it my all, it's out of my hands. I can't control what others like, say or do. I can only control the effort I put in, the way I treat my clients and employees, and the integrity with which I operate my business.

It is said that the proper tension in a putter grip is strong enough that it won't fall out of your hands when you swing it, but gentle enough that if someone pulled on it, it would come free. The same is true of business. To borrow a phrase from .38 Special, "Hold on Loosely." 

• Hold on to your clients with excellence in service, but don't squeeze in fear, you'll only drive them away.
• Hold on to your employees with respect and praise, but don't harness their talents for fears that they might get too good and leave you. Incentivize them so that their job is too good to leave. 
• Hold on to your creative process AND your deadlines, but set yourself up to succeed, and don't let the fear of failure force you into producing work that doesn't meet your standards for excellence. 

And if one day you find yourself standing on the green, in a sudden death playoff with a 3-footer to stay alive, trust your ability, trust your read, and don't squeeze.